Saturday, June 26, 2010

Wishing yourself away

With all of the year end activities going on with my 12 year old daughter I am a little preoccupied with the transition from child to teen. So forgive me if my entries for awhile have a common theme.

My daughter loves sports, as a result she sweats. With the sweat comes the odd pimple. When she was getting ready for her dinner dance she pleaded with me to use some kind of cover-up to eliminate the sight of a few little spots she had on her chest.

This scenario vividly reminded me how insecure I got at that age. Strong in some ways, but always with the self doubting. My girlfriends were all more popular with the boys, prettier, slimmer, had nicer skin, perfect hair....

We are sucked into this vortex of what is physically beautiful. Now I know that physical beauty really has nothing to do with how attractive you are. At the time I could not be convinced of that and I am sure I will struggle to convince my daughter now.

I hear her say, "I wish my hair was ...., I wish my skin was..., I wish...."

She cannot wish her self away. She cannot be someone else, but then they cannot be her, although I am sure there are many who wish they could be - she is pretty awesome. All I need to do is somehow get her to see how amazing she is and how to embrace herself.

We age and lose physical beauty. We have surgeries that take away our breasts. What endures is our 'self'. It is our 'self' that really makes us beautiful, strong, charismatic, funny, intelligent and more. I never want to wish that away.

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